Why Should Men Care About Rape?

Often when I have a discussion about how to prevent rape there's something I notice about the others around me.  Very rarely are there other men having this discussion.  There's a number of reasons why this could be.  It could be what they want to say is already being said by some of the women.  One reason may be they're worried about the assumptions others might make about them if they get involved in a "women's" issue.  Another reason, which I hope isn't the answer, could be that they don't care about rape.

Why should men care about rape?  It's a question I will always ask other men.  It's something that often stumps them.  We know rape is bad, but we never really talk about why men should care about it.  There are many reasons why beyond because rape is bad, but here are just a few:

Men are victims of rape.  Although the media typically shows victims of rape being women, one in sex men will experience rape.    It is rarely reported though.  Men are told they're not supposed to be victims.  They're told they are supposed to be strong, fearless, and to take charge.  What would others think of a man then if he was a victim of sexual assault?  Because of outside pressure, many men don't exercise their strength or fearlessness and take charge to bring their assailant to justice, yet it is the very embodiment of courage men are told to have.

Men know victims of rape.  Whether they know it or not, many men know a survivor of sexual assault.  When you look at the statistics, 1 in 4 women, 1 in 6 men, 1 rape every 2.5 minutes, there is a strong possibility of knowing a survivor.  Think of how many men and women we know in our lives, how many we come in contact with every day.  If it's more than 4 women and more than 6 men, it's likely you may know a survivor.  By showing you are willing to do something about rape, you are showing them you are someone who will listen and won't judge them by what has happened to them.

Men are confined by rape.  Ask any woman what they've been told to keep from being raped and they can give you a list that looks something like this:  park under a light; don't walk alone; carry pepper spray.  They're told not to trust any men when they're alone because that man could be a rapist.  Whenever I see someone with car trouble in a parking lot, I always make sure I let them know I'm coming to help well before I get to them, for one so I don't get sprayed with pepper spray.  But this is something that all men can relate to, having to pay the price for another man who committed rape.  Which leads us to...

Men commit rape.  Although most men do not rape, most rapes are committed by men.  It's why men are confined by rape.  Thanks to a select few, any of us men are a suspect of a future crime.  Because of this, rape is not just a women's issue, but also one for men to have an equal concern.

Men can stop rape.  If we hold ourselves and each other accountable, men are capable of preventing a large number of rapes.  If we step in and act when we see something that doesn't look right; if we act as role models for other men; if we show concern on our part for rape being an issue, we can stop rape.

If you'd like to know more about sexual assault prevention or schedule a presentation, contact Ash Christians at 989-790-7500 ext. 226 or achristians@sac-saginaw.org.