It's been a while since the media has covered the allegations against Jerry Sandusky but the passing of Joe Paterno has also reminded us of the controversy. As the attention fades away, replaced by the next controversy, we can't forget the lessons that can be learned from it. I've often heard comments like "the world is crazy now" and "this stuff never used to happen." Sexual abuse in coaching is nothing new. Many successful athletes like Margaret Hoelzer, Theo Fleury, and Sheldon Kennedy have all come forward and revealed a history of abuse. So what has changed? Why are we hearing about it now?
Two important things have changed. The first is that victims are treated differently. Before, there was a fear for survivors that they would be blamed, ridiculed, or even not believed. Sadly, those fears weren't unwarranted. If sexual abuse didn't fit the text book ideal of what rape was, then it must not have happened. The common belief was victims were always women and abusers were always creepy loners with vans and mustaches. These predators were supposed to be someone nobody liked or got along with because they were evil to the very core. Someone you just knew was bad. Unfortunately that couldn't be further from the truth. They are sometimes friends, neighbors, coaches, and family members. They want to be liked. That's how they get away with it. Too many people are misled by believing "it couldn't be your neighbor of 15 years; he always mows your lawn when you're on vacation and is just a nice guy" or "it couldn't be the little league coach; he's always so good with the kids".
Then there's the belief that things like that don't happen here. Sexual assault is a city problem. That's what people in Hinsdale, IL thought before Robert Mueller, a former basketball coach, was convicted of having sexual relationships with two female students. The idea of "we're a small community and we don't have those kind of people here" actually attracts sexual predators. Just as offenders pay attention to which states have the easier laws for their sex offender registry, they also pay attention to what communities they will likely be noticed in. It is the very definition of ignorance is bliss.
But that brings us to the second thing that has changed. People are more open to victims now. They are willing to believe that anyone is could be an abuser. The more open and understanding we become, the better our chances are of preventing sexual abuse. Survivors feel safer to come forward and predators can be stopped before a controversy breaks with a long list of victims.
We can also accept the idea that sexual abuse can happen here, but we're not going to let it. The first step to combat sexual abuse in sports is to have policies and trainings in place on mandatory reporting and proper conduct. A coach wrapping his arms around a batter to help practice a swing may have completely innocent intentions, but how does it appear? It is something some abusers have used to blur boundaries with children. It's not always safe to just rely on people having common sense either. We develop common sense from life experiences, and those experiences come with mistakes. By having trainings for coaches, those mistakes can be avoided. By parents and coaches watching each other, we can all work together to protect children.
If you have questions or are interested in any trainings for teaching or coaching staff, sexual assault and harassment policies, please contact Ash Christians at the Sexual Assault Center of Child and Family Services by calling 989-790-7500 ext. 226 or emailing achristians@sac-saginaw.org.
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