Boy Scouts' "Perversion Files" Made Public

Last week, the Oregon Supreme Court ordered for the release of the Boy Scouts of America's "Perversion Files" covering from 1965 to 1985.  What these files contain are reports on 1,247 incidents with leaders and volunteers being banned after being accused of sexual or inappropriate behavior.  The release is one of the outcomes of a 2010 case where a Scoutmaster had been convicted of sexually abusing a scout.

The Boy Scouts have opposed the release of the files, claiming that even though the identities of victims had been removed, there's still a possibility of harm that could come to them from the release.  They've also expressed a fear that others may be discouraged from reporting, knowing that the report would eventually become public, having only recently enacted a policy requiring mandatory reporting to police in 2011.

These claims are actually the opposite of what is most likely to happen.  In truth, the secrecy of a reporting process often fuels mistrust and isolation, leading victims to believe nothing is actually being done.  You see it even with bullying.  Transparency encourages reporting.  It builds a trust in the system when victims can see something is actually being done.  It gives them confidence that reporting isn't for nothing when they can see a punishment enforced.  No matter how strong an investigation nor how severe a punishment, if it happens in the shadows then victims and future victims will feel abandoned.

Often the argument is made that a low-key investigation protects the innocence of the accused, but that must be weighed against the potential of future harm.  Should rape victims be left to feel alone, unaware if justice has been served?  That's exactly how Keith Early, a scout who had been abused by his Scoutmaster felt.  Victims are already isolated because of how uncomfortable people are with sexual abuse.  At least let them see there are others trying to help.

Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, a time when survivors are recognized amid candlelight vigils and memorials for the ones who were lost.  It is also a time when people can reflect on prevention.  Often when domestic violence comes to mind it is accompanied by images of bruises, blood, and tears.  But what commercials and posters only briefly touch on are other forms of abuse like spousal rape, manipulation, and control.  To prevent the abuse these topics are ones that also need to be addressed.  The signs need to be known before they can be visible.

Much like rape, domestic violence is a crime about power.  The abuser expresses power over the victim as a way to show superiority.  It's often been a myth that domestic violence was a byproduct of people with anger issues, but it's actually the opposite.  Abusers are defined by their ability to control, both themselves and their victims.  They've learned to restrain their anger and use it as a tool of intimidation only when in private.  It's how they blend in.  If abusers had difficulty controlling themselves and their violence, no one would be around them.  They would drive everyone away from them and an unhealthy relationship wouldn't even be possible.  This is why they strive as manipulators, which we talked about more in-depth recently.

The abuse also doesn't "just happen."  As part of the manipulation, an abuser doesn't dive into physical violence from the first date.  Over time an abuser will push the boundaries of their victims, testing how easy they can impose their will.  It starts with seeing friends and family less, maybe even turning the victim against their loved ones by pointing out disagreements.  They slowly chip away at the support structure, leaving only themselves as the one the victim relies on.

That's when the intimidation and violence become more open.  Victims feel trapped.  All the people they would have normally turned to are gone.  They've been isolated by an abusive partner and dependent on them.  This is also why some victims will try to explain away the actions of the abuser.  Lines like "they're not like that all the time," or "you don't know them like I do," try to defend the abuse.  That's because the violence isn't constant, but occurs in a cycle.  First there is the honeymoon phase, where everything seems perfect and they are so in love with their partner.  But as that fades away, the control begins to show and the nervous phase comes in.  The victim is walking on egg shells, worried anything might set their partner off.  But with abusers, no matter how cautious the victim is it doesn't matter.  They will find an excuse and that will be the explosion phase, where sexual and physical abuse occur.  Afterward, an abuse may apologize, buy gifts, and make promises that it will never happen again, bringing it back around to the honeymoon phase again.

There are warning signs to watch for in an unhealthy relationship.  The best form of prevention is to know your boundaries and stick to them.  Don't just watch out for yourself, but watch out for others and keep these signs in mind:

Does the person you are with…

• Ignore your personal boundaries?
• Not listen to what you have to say?
• Get jealous or possessive of you and/or your time?
• Get upset when you don’t do what he/she wants?
• Try to make you feel guilty in order to get his/her way?
• Use alcohol or other drugs while in your presence?
• Pressure you to use alcohol or drugs?
• Insist you go somewhere alone with him/her when you don’t want to?
• Try to pressure you to have sex?
• Have more experience than you?

It's Not Bullying... It's Hazing! That Makes It Okay, Right?

From athletic fields to office buildings there has been a tradition of breaking in the new blood, rituals that are supposed to make them one of the group.  Many times it occurs as embarrassment and assault, sometimes resulting in death.  This ceremony of course is the practice of hazing.

Just this past week news broke of a high school soccer team in La Puente, California being investigated for sexual assault as part of a hazing ritual.  New members of the team would be taken to a room beside the coach's office, told to undress and then they were assaulted with the end of a pole.  This is an act that investigators have speculated to have been occurring for over two years.

In August, a video of Sergeant Phillip Roach being hazed as a "rite of passage" into the Army went viral.  After being struck in the chest with a wooden mallet, he collapsed and struck his head, requiring 6 staples to close the wound.

With such tragic and despicable outcomes of hazing, one would wonder what's even the point of it?  Those who hold onto the rituals claim it builds unity in the group.  It's something they've all been through and it becomes a bond they share.  However, that isn't exactly what's going on.

Hazing is at its core a form of sanctioned bullying.  It establishes a person's place in the hierarchy of a group.  The fact that other members abuse new recruits establishes their rank as seniors to those hoping to join.  It gives them power which they are more than willing to express.  This is the same goal for bullying.  They are acts which harm or embarrass someone in an effort to show they are lesser than the ones committing the acts.  When you talk to those who have been through the hazing rituals about how they hated it, they are still willing to do it to the next round of recruits.  Why, when someone admits how awful it is, would they continue it?  Because it means they're no longer at the bottom.  It gives them a way to show their status in the group.  It is also as a method of exclusion, with the the assaults and behavior being even more difficult on recruits they don't want to join.  For these people, they are only there for others to express their power, having no real opportunity to join.

So what can be done about hazing?  For starters, enacting policy which prohibits it.  There are other ways to form bonds within a team.  Some are mentoring programs by veteran members, not only helping a new recruit to be acclimated more quickly but also building a sense of ownership to the group.  There are numerous team building exercises which place an emphasis on people finding their role in a group based on their strengths and showing how the team can benefit from each member.

Ultimately, hazing won't end until those within a group decide not to do it anymore.  It's when they are able to break the chain and say that they won't do the same, even if it was done to them.  It is the courage of those who are willing to stand out that will end the cycle.